I support wolverhampton wanderers who are football team (soccer if you are american). Im 15 and im good fiends with rob, josh & luke who are also on here. Rob is a professional vet and race-car driver. He is currently working in morrisons trying to raise some cash to buy a cow. I have brown hair, and brown eyes.I have an xbox, ps2, and a p.c. I prefer to play sim games like championship manager, football manager, the sims even though its a load of crap. i adore the GRAND THEFT AUTO SERIES. I also wonder why americans call the world series the world series when they and Japan are the only countries that participate in it. (all the ribs and burgers must have gone to their heads instead of their stomachs). I also have a friend called Jonathan Maley who is really amusing, he's from Haiti but its not his fault, he really enjoys football aswell and plays for the Haiti under 18's, he plays in every single position. Although at the moment, he is currently working in Homebase trying to aid his curry addiction. Josh however is currently working as a stuntman in the latest Noddy motion picutre. But Ciaran Treanor is the one that suprises me as he has an addicition to alicia morris is who oranger than the colour orange, there is also a drout of foundation in the world at the moment. Luke Barney is a professor at clown college, believe me this 1 is addicted 2 girls. Luke even has a job in Beatties, in the lingerie department, he thoroughly enjoys his work, the lucky bugger. My best chum is Phil Neville, oh he's great fun, showed me his new sandcastle last week, fantastic detail. Also remember my good friend Jonathan Maley, he has now invested his money with Josh Barnett into the Alicia Morris foundation foundation, we hope that they get a lot of donations. Sadly, Rob now wants a pet ant so he is working double shifts in Morrisons. I also have a friend called Kieran Diver who is a perfume tycoon. You may have heard of it, it's called "Diver" and is availible in all brothels in europe, hopefully coming to America after a successful trial in 1941. Matt Guy is the local pimp/business man/gangster, don't get involved. He currently owns Mary Dairy Cakes and Mary Dairy gangster wear exclusive to him, very expensive. Michael Bucknall is a puppeteer and is currently working in nurseries trying to aid his noddy addiction, he is gay with Kieran Diver. Paul Aston once tried to commit suicide off a curb, its true ask Maley. Paul once got caught trying to rob some knickers and a red dress. Mike Bucknall and Kieran Diver are gay lovers in the south of france, they a have a puppy called Florence, last week Kieran gave birth to a healthy baby boy called Cory-Iver-Diver-Bucknall weighing in at 20 stone, we wish them well. Also Alicia Morris has filed for divorce in her troubled marriage to Ciaran Treanor.

Rob O'Donovan has now moved up in the world he is a post man posting curry through peoples doors, he is saving up for a spoon. Luke Barney won $100,000,000 on the American state lottery we all hope he spends on a well earned drink and maybe af ew tarts. I ate a tin of beans for breakfast this morning with baby Cory-Iver, takes after his mom (Kieran). Also Dermot Kennedy got married to Tom Heath in a much publicised wedding. Kieran Diver has annoucned that he is handing down Kieran entreprises when his son turns 20, little Cory-Iver will be very happy.

Oh not forgetting that Kieran Diver (Kee-wee man for some people) will be fighting long term lover Mrs 'Jarvinator' Jarvis at the NEC on June 24th, ticket prices are 25p. If you bet with William Hill you will see that they see the Jarvinator as the new Heavyweight Business Studies Champion at 1/33, Kieran is the clear outsider at 100000/1. Little Cory Iver is believed to be training his daddy, oh well.

There is good news for all sports fans who are dislexic and who are always lookig for a bargin, Tom Marshall has opened up his new 100% unofficial sports clothing store, he's got Durby shirts a bargain basement prices, the new Barka-lona kit should be in soon, its great, and its got the official premier league badge with spain written on it, but the best part of the deal is that you get the Hull Town shorts. The Reel-Madrid kit is also going to be in, with all shirts having Chris Akabussi on the back. Not forgetting on the grand opening day Wolves manager Sir Alex Ferguson is going to pop in, and you never know he might say to you, 'You're playing for Wolves'. Wolves midfield maestro Jay-Jay Okocha and bench warmer Eric Djemba-Djemba will also be making a special guest appearances so go on down.

I recently watched Mrs Jarvis': I am a good driver (recommended to me by my good mate Jonny), and i have to say that the woman should be put in the babyseat, her driving was well below the national average for Britons, for example she ran over Kris Akabussi several times beofre attacking him with a business studies book, the documentary also showed the awful state of the police force in this country but i am not going to go in to much detail. Rite we havent heard alot from Luke Barney and i am getting very concerned, because of this i have informed all brothels within Earth that he is missing. I have some good news, well good news for me anyway, i will be marrying Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Saggy Balls, i can't wait. Good news for all you animal lovers, Nottingham Forest maestro Gregor Robertson has opened up an animal sanctuary just outside Forests changing room, he only recently discovered his love for animals when he was attacked by a swan at Forests training complex. Hayley Hayles, Tessy Sherington, Kelly Kelly and Robert Robertson are backing the project.

Now you have got too feel for fat people, i mean first of all no one likes them, they fuckin stink and one more thing they consume too much oxygen. Anyway the point tha i am trying to get around is, how do really really fat women know that they are pregnant, i mean lets face it, they could stick several Citreon Xsara Picasso's under their clothes and no one would be the wiser, getting back to the pregnant point, i bet when they are about to give birth they would probably just think that it was a massive shit as the 14 bags of doritos and the 400 flakes were consumed the night before.

I would also like to know what the deal is with all girls supportin Manchester United?, i know there good but you cannot seriously be a fan if you are from the black country, i does not make sense. Oh yes if you are American and you are readin this, GO ON THE HALF THE CALORIES DIET!! YOU FAT SHITS, oh yes and tell Tony Blair's bumboy A.k.A George Bush A.k.A the thick one on 2DTV to go on a diet, oh yes not forgetting his twin daughters are complete mingers with a capital M! Well i am going to tell you a story which you may not believe but it is in fact very turthful. Let me take you back to May 2001 when SMTV was in its prime, my uncle phil got shot in the back by my auntie, lisa dingle, and Man Utd had comfortably won the title for the 9th or 10th time, Leicester were on the brink of spending 23 million quid on what they call football players and Wolves' future looked like, well how can i put it, what would you do if you was a turkey and you caught bernard matthews grinning at you?, exactly!, Anyways getting back to this embarassing but true story, my father and i embarked on a trip to the legendary Butlins within the Minehead area. After i few days i was getting my bearings of the shit hole but anyways while witnessing what they called entertainment i embarked on a trip to the toilet (the bathroom if your fat) (american) (oh by the way i was not going for masturbation purposes) while using the facilities i decided to wet my hair, however while doing this i began to get funny looks from the fellow toilet (bathroom) (if ur fat) (american), to my horror i then realised that there was white soap suds pouring out of my hair, well i thought it was something to do with puberty, (i now know that it was not), so looking like a snowman, i washed it out. After watching the appauling magic show with that Stephen wats-it-a-ma-fingy, y'no the one that does them crap magic tricks on CITV i decided that enough was enough, therefore i was going back to my room, when i got back i noticed that on my bedside table there was shower gel which i put on my hair!!. My daddy recently broke the national speed limit nearly 4 times over while on his way he managed to crush mrs jarvis who eventually fell into a drain and drowned - the business studies world will never b the same agen - may her crap teaching soul rest in several million pieces. Ne who we hav proof oh this bcos on my daddys speed-o-meter