Maybe if my heart stops beating it won't hurt this much
And ever will I have to answer again to anyone
Please don't get me wrong... because
I'll never let this go, but I can't find the words to tell you
I don't wanna be alone, but now I feel like I don't know you
One day you'll get sick of saying that everything's alright
And by then I'm sure I'll be pretending just like I am tonight...

This song is from a band called Paramore, it truly reflects how I feel like right now, it's funny and weird to feel when your heart is broken, or maybe just bruised for all the things you've been through, all the lies, confusion, betrayals, and all those things that keep messing with your head and heart... if someone knows how I can let it go, please let me know, it would be helpful, cause now I'm tired of being, how can I put this?? Hurt all the time, I feel like I can't get up, finally, I'm asking for help to stand up from the ground, walk straight to my golds no matter what...